Most days I am content here in our settled little life. More than content-- I am at peace. But sometimes, like today, the wind stirs up something inside of me and I long to be on the road again.
Wanting to be here and there is nothing new. For almost a decade now, this pull and tug has been a constant feeling. During the years I was traveling in South America, a corner of my heart always longed to be at home, with my family. And now that we're here, in a home of our own, close to family and friends, my heart rattles and stirs to be on the road again. I'm equal parts homebody and travel-bum, meaning I never seem to be entirely settled, on the road nor at home.
I try to remind myself that traveling wasn't always great, in an attempt to cool the longing. Now that there are years of distance between that life and this, it's easy to romanticize our nomadic life. But there were hungry times. Scary times. Times I longed for stability and security and a hot bath. Money was tight and we always seemed to be boarding a bus for another 18 hour ride somewhere (I do NOT miss the bus rides...)
I've learned to accept the pull and tug, to breathe through the feelings of wanderlust that make me want to pack our bags, throw caution to the wind, and hit the road.
This too shall pass. I will find peace and contentment in the rhythms of home again, and in a few months, we'll be off to Peru, to fill up our hearts with travel and adventure.
(Alexis took this picture of me on our first day in Venezuela, back in 2007. We'd been traveling for days, and just out of the frame of the picture is all of our gear that we'd be hauling around-- backpacks, jewelry racks, a didgeridoo, and a unicycle. We knew no one in Venezuela, had no idea where we were going to sleep, and hadn't had a solid meal in far too long. But despite all of this, we were ecstatic to be on a gorgeous beach in a new land (I know I don't look that excited in the picture...) And in the end it all worked out-- we found a great house with very colorful housemates and spent a few lovely months selling jewelry on this gorgeous island.)